Findings:
- I would have leapt at the innuendo you had strewn at my feet.
- He's been places they have not.
- What if I had never met you? How much the poorer would my life have been.
- I would have attempted to draw her if she had stayed that way.
- What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
- I have no proof that he would ever want to kiss or destroy me.
- "Of course humans aren't intelligent. They don't even have glurbleflukers. If you can't glurblefluke, you're not sentient."
- "The Americans in their wisdom have taken the heads off the pictures, enlarged them and superimposed them with the heads of animals and then strung them up all over the walls of the interrogation room," he said
- Why would he want a writer when he could have a dancer?
- They made the sunrise for people like us just so we have an excuse for why we're still up.
- I would have cooled this if you had written it
- They have a trendy name for every different kind of fucked up.
- he would have laughed
- The ones with their priorities straight don't know how to get what they want, and the ones who get what they want have messed up priorities.
- It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
- he would have cried
- If it had been able to, the light would have smiled
- Would I have hid myself away if I had known I'd never be found?
- I would a thousand times rather have had a simple cheap sandwich with a friend
- If I had the money I would get lost. God knows I have the time.
- What would aliens think if they talked to an average western human being?
- You stole what they would have given you
- He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
- They have no bones.
- Man's desire to blow shit up, and to have a nice attache case
- If people weren't meant to be eaten, they wouldn't be made of meat!
- If we catapulted outlaws, only pawn shops would have guns
- Have you eaten (rice) yet?
- How and why do we (humans) have culture?
- Friend, you have a lot to learn if you think loving me would be a bad idea.
- Never underestimate the impact you have on your fellow human beings.
- A lot of houses don't even have anyone to board them up.
- And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn't been for you meddling kids!
- If this were in person, I would have kissed her now
- They say that I have the best ass below 14th Street
- just to have some human contact
- People have fucked up before
- If you were team captain in a pick-up game of baseball and had Jesus Christ on your team, what position would you play him?
- What tasty food would be distusting if eaten over rice?
- The zeal of thine house hath eaten me up
- Paper, rock, scissors. They all have their pros and cons.
- Bernie would have won
- They call you heartless, but you have a heart, and I love you for being ashamed to show it. You are ashamed of your flood, while others are ashamed of their ebb.
- Can God create a boulder so large He can't have anal sex with it?
- No one has ever died because they DIDN'T have a toothpick
- When I woke up this morning I had no regrets - I felt no shame
- Humans have six senses, why does everyone think we only have five?
- if music was a woman you would have a mistress
- What Have They Done to the Rain
- How many lives could have been saved had we just said "Please" more often?
- Why beverage cans have concave bottoms
- No human artists have appeared in the Top 40 music chart for the past 5 years
- They are angry and they have been lied to
- They have taken enough
- I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
- They must have faces
- He had a life before he met you, you know
- Karl Marx must have had a lousy job
- i have messed up. i am a horrible person.
- We have met the enemy and he is us
- Never meddle in the affairs of wizards, especially before they have their coffee
- Wishfully think they have souls.
- some people are so poor, all they have is money
- If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.
- They didn't have the heart
- Have I forgotten how to stand up with the humor and the need?
- from where I stand I can see they have already won
- he had a dream
- How many a dispute could have been deflated into a single paragraph if the disputants had dared to define their terms.
- He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
- The dead eat hope. We had none to give them, so they were pretty emaciated by the end.
- Why some mammals have an aversion to water
- Nodes your Grandma would have liked
- If you didn't have free will, would you know it?
- For future reference, when in eternity or insanity; dreams I would like to have
- Why couldn't it have been an action picture that had just started?
- Ernie and Bert are not gay. They're puppets. They don't even have legs.
- Baptist fear of dancing
- The "How many partners have you had" question
- Guys who don't tell you they have a girlfriend
- They Have a Word for It
- I have a face I cannot show, I make the rules up as I go
- You have had sex with all the people your partner has had sex with
- If I had a rocket launcher, some son of a bitch would pay!
- I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
- It is never too late to be what you would have been
- He will have the taste of warm ripe fruit in his mouth
- I have pushed many humans I have shoved many more
- Shall I tell you stories of other stars: stars that you love, that deserve your love. Stars that do not disappoint, and disgust, and disgrace your love. Oh, I have hope they exist for your sake!
- Hello, my name is... Would you like to have sex?
- Questions I have had today
- If we had a more developed tailbone, would we wag our tail?
- If everyone had a flower instead of a gun, there would be no more war
- if you have had your midnights
- I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
- Every morning when I wake up, I feel guilty for all the things I have ever been
- I have to get up early and do laundry so I can wear something nice to the weirdo sex club
- Living well is only the best revenge if they don't have a fuckable sibling
- The FOOLS! They laughed at my theories at the university, but I'll have my revenge! I'll have my REVENGE!
- Why the ancient Babylonians would have loved high definition television
- Where have my wings gone? They are hidden, embarrassed to be seen.
- Did You Ever Have to Make Up Your Mind?
- Don't ever lie. If you lie to your friends, they won't trust you, and you'll have nothing, and you'll never be safe.
- The Story of Jason Squiff and Why He Had a Popcorn Hat, Popcorn Mittens and Popcorn Shoes
- When I woke up this morning, I thought I was a parallelogram. I still have a sneaking suspicion.
- I would have killed for a sexual thought
- If I had the nerve, I would ask you
- The Message of King Sakis and the Legend of the Twelve Dreams He Had in One Night
- Yesterday, I believe I would never have done what I did today.
- if you had it as an option, would you take it?
- I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
- They say the smog is the reason we have such beautiful sunsets
- Bernie would have won "ANY BREAKFAST BAGEL SANDWICH" at McDonald's
- Would you rather have a matrimony profile?
- He tells me that I could have his heart and I want to take it right then, slip it into my pocket and run
- people do, on the whole, have the right to be who they want to be
- She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
- If a frog had wings, he wouldn't kick his tail when he jumped
- They had been expecting me
- What kind of year have YOU had?
- I had no idea what he thought about me.
- They had built the Unrecordable Sculpture again last night
- Amakuni once drew an old sword of his from a box, suddenly overjoyed by something he had cast aside.
- She disappeared as if he had only dreamed her
- We have had enough of your beige
- King George he had a Date
- How does the Military Selective Service Act apply to individuals who have had a sex change?
- They have potential, if they only applied themselves
- You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
- You should have killed me when you had the chance
- Do unto others as you would have others do unto you
- How to tell when you have really messed up your relationship
- People only enter relationships to have extravagant break ups
- Don Quixote had his windmills, I have my helicopters
- He Had Not Where To Lay His Head
- Having an S on a transcript rather than a B
- What Have They Done to the Rain?
- They had left, but her mascara kept running
- If I had called you, would you still be dead?
- I thought I had some great insight into human nature, but I didn't
- All the terrible disadvantages an invisible man would have in the world
- I have to check and see if they wear panties
- Having gotten myself into a position where I can have my cake and eat it too, I feel no compulsion to get up from the table
- Advantages an invisible man would have in the world
- Girls who tell you they have a boyfriend
- you would have been
- You know what? I've had it up to here with "Trix are for kids!" Give the rabbit a fucking bowl of cereal, you dick!
- If you had swerved a little to the right, you'd have missed it
- It's not enough they take your life away with a gun; they have to take it away with their pens, too
- Roman Catholic theology of a cloned human's soul
- People want what they cannot have
- When they say "Gotta have it!" they mean it!
- We had to go away ... and dream it all up again
- I would like to have emotions
- How many genes do we (humans) have?
- I would have liked thunder when she left
- They Had No Poet
- Buying things just because they have cool packaging
- I have had enough of Survivor
- I love you so much that I have to break up with you
- What pornos would have us believe
- The eyes of the dead may not blink, but they have been known to wander
- See a penny, pick it up and all day long you'll have good luck
- Terminating a pregnancy due to Down Syndrome
- Would ye have a young Virgin of fifteen Years
- Did the Japanese go and sit down and have dinner with Pearl Harbor before they bombed 'em?
- They could have saved Kevin
- Things that would have seemed unbelievable about 11 years ago
- To a Poet, who would have me Praise certain Bad Poets, Imitators of His and Mine
- though they could speak and had beautiful voices
- All of us have looked up to an older kid at some point
- He had something to say. He said it.
- when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
- because I have given up any care
- People who think they have to double-click everything
- we woke up to find you gone. well, said the city, we still have the river.
- I might have expected that the mushrooms would worship you
- I have made up a name for my disease
- Having gotten myself into a position where I can have my cake and eat it too, I feel a strong compulsion to get up from the table
- If it were a snake, it would have bit me
- So long Arthur Miller! Who do I have to look up to now?
- The Fun They Had
If you Log in you could create a "If he had, they would have eaten it up. Humans are fascinating." node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.