makes countertops shine picks up dirt and debris
smooths wrinkled skin and makes omelets a breeze
hurry call now this offer won’t last
it’s gone when it’s gone our supply’s going fast
makes a mountain of fries from a single potato
cuts steel in half and still slices tomatoes
a million women can’t be wrong says the ad
but more than a million already have
a million women could always be wrong
or a million men or Hasidic Jews
or a million gay bowlers in pink bowling shoes
a million people of any persuasion
could always be wrong on any occasion
a million fatheads in MAGA T-shirts
are a million too many and so wrong that it hurts
and unlike the slicer that juliennes fries
or the pill or the cream that takes years off your thighs
wrong never quits
wrong never dies
wrong gets louder as it grows larger
wrong becomes prouder as it gets darker
and none plus none is none all day long
a million white lies will never be right
but a million white tigers
a million red kites―
a million chrysanthemums
can never be wrong.