After taking ecstasy for the first time last weekend, I wrote up a lengthy
timeline of the whole
experience. It should be noted that this was my ecstasy experience, and for anyone else it could be very
different. The timings are given relative to when I swallowed the pill (0215 on a Sunday morning) Moreover, I don't know for sure what the
composition of the
pill I took was (though it was probably
MDMA). Finally, remember that MDMA, and most related psychedelics, are illegal almost everywhere in the world.
Tom's first experience pilling.
T -3:00 I get ready. I put on my Cyberdog logo t-shirt, blue jeans and a few bead braclets and necklases. Put dummy on necklace. Hide pills in Maglite, having removed battery.
T -2:00 Meet up with mates. Have a few tokes on a joint as I'm walking down to South Ken station. Grab more cash than i'll probably need. Get tube to Brixton
T -1:45 Start queueing for Convergence at The Fridge. Give up and go to Club 414 after 90 minutes.
T 0:00 I get into Club 414 after perfunctory search. Go to bar and grab Red Bull. Down pill with Red Bull. Head for dance floor (packed and playing Hard Techno).
T +0:15 I start to notice the presence of other people on the dancefloor more. Knocking into people and things feels more noticeable than it should. At this point i'm not entirely sure if pills are working properly.
T +0:30 As before, but more pronounced. At this point, i'm sure the e is doing something, but I'm not sure if I like it.
T +0:45 From my pill reports, this is when i should come up, but whilst dancing I still only feel more awake, and more aware of the other ravers. When I go and sit down, I really feel the effects of what i've taken. Despite sitting somewhat awkwardly against the wall, I feel very warm and happy, and all stimuli feel pleasurable. Drinking cold water feels very enjoyable. The feel of the leg of the guy next to me feels warm and sexual. I realise that I have come up, big time.
T +1:00 I go upstairs to meet my friends, who i find in an e-puddle in the corner. Although I don't feel self conscious when they talk about how it's my first time on e, I don't feel confident enough to join in their rubbing and stroking. After chatting, inanely, for a few minutes, I head back downstairs. I knock into a guy on the way down, who is carrying a cup of coffee. It splashes on me, and i appologise to him. The feeling of the hot coffee on my skin, which i'd expect to hurt, is pleasurable. It seems that any stimulation is enjoyable.
T +1:30 After a bit more dancing, I go to the toilets to splash myself with water (a very enjoyable experience) and refill my water bottles. There isn't a mirror in the toilets, so i can't see what a state i'm in. The classic side effectof grinding teeth starts to manifest itself, and I put my dummy in my mouth. It feels so good! For the next 75 minutes, I alternate between dancing, and cuddling my friends. Dancing seems more natural and easier than when sober. My legs don't start to hurt, and i'm not as awkward as usual. When cuddling and back rubbing my mates, I enjoy every stimulation in a very pleasurable way; my entire body is an erogenous zone.
Overall, the high is closer to dope than alcohol, though saying e is like dope is completely inaccurate. Though the feeling is similar, it is stronger with e, more loved up, and, obviously, as e is an amphetamine-related stimulant, it makes you want to dance rather than lounge about. The biggest difference from dope or alcohol is however the way it makes you react to stimulation, the feeling that every touch is sexual, and that all music is banging.
T +2:45 The feeling of total happiness starts to fade slightly, though I still feel much happier than usual. The effects of touch and music are still enhanced a lot. I continue to alternate between dancing and sitting down, and drink a lot. The feeling of the sweat running down my face is very enjoyable, but it is only on feeling this that I realise i'm losing a lot of fluid and not replacing it, as i don't feel thirsty. I drink more than I think i need in order to make up for this.
T: +3:45 As i continue to come down, I feel progressively less euphoric, and more peaceful, as we leave the club. I bid farewell to my friends, who are staying for the afterparty. I hug some of them again, and thank Adam for safely guiding me through a highly enjoyable night. When i ask someone how much of a state i look, he comments that my "pupils are like planets", which I realise could be an issue when I get security to let me in at my halls of residence.
T: +4:30 Finally get onto tube after a 45 minute wait. There are dozens of other clubbers on the train. I come a (distant) second, in terms of attracting attention, to a bunch of cybers who've clearly just left Torture Garden. A few middle aged clubbers look at me, in what i think is a "I was there once" way, on seeing my massively dilated pupils, and that i'm chewing energeticly on a dummy.
T: +5:15 I get back to Southside, and go to the security lodge, as i'm missing my swipe card. The security guard stares at the dummy round my neck, and my eyes, and obviously knows that i'm in a right state. He lets me in without question. I go and watch mindless children's TV over an hour, as i am wide awake. I text my brother, and best friend, in order to comment on the quality of the pills. I rehydrate with Sprite. I see two people I know, both of whom fail to notice the state that i'm in. When i point out my dummy and pupils to Dick, a friend of about 10 years, he seems unimpressed. I can't gauge Simon's reaction. I am still feeling peaceful, and the stimulation of the Sprite can, the sofa, dawn, birds, all seem very different to normal, and are still very enjoyable.
T: +6:30 I go to bed, despite feeling rather awake. The covers feel silky and cool, despite being neither. I'm asleep in less than 5 minutes.
T: +12:00 I wake up. I feel less tired than i should, after the exercise and lack of sleep. Everything I touch and see still feels different, and my mood is still elevated above baseline. I watch Arsenal v. Liverpool on TV. The other guys there also don't notice my pilledness until i mention it
T: +14:00 I'm still not feeling normal. I sit around in my room for an hour writing this. Afterwards i put on some Ash and Foo Fighters and chill for a bit. I cuddle pillows, stroke things, and suck my dummy. I spend the rest of the afternoon doing nothing much, except phoning friends,
T: +17:00 I put a pizza in the oven for supper. Whilst it's cooking, I have a shower and change. The shower, like everything else, feels different, as though it's at an ideal temperature. The pizza tastes delicious, despite being from Sainsbury's. I go to Southside bar for the pub quiz. I'm still not baseline! I have a few drinks, and perform rather as expected in the quiz. I remember what a sea breeze cocktail is, for no apparent reason.
T:+21:00 After the quiz I sit around watching TV a bit, and chat to some in the kitchen. We talk inanely, mainly about me, for a while. Sonia quizzes me somewhat over my e usage. Her and her friend seem convinced that i'm still high. Sort of true.
T: +24:00 I go to bed, at 2am, exactly a day after dropping. I am still noticing some effects, specifically that everything feels so comfortable and warm. I get to sleep, eventually.
Overall, it was a highly enjoyable experience, and no, I didn't get abjectly depressed over the next couple of days. Like everything, best done in moderation.