Went to my sister's to celebrate Memorial Day. I woke up with a lot of anxiety and trepidation which was largely unfounded as I had the best holiday I've had in years, maybe in my entire adult life. I'm not a parade person, but my nieces wanted to go. My mom bought us iced slushy drinks, the weather was absolutely perfect, warm with a breeze that kept the heat of the sun away. I remembered to pack sunscreen and had time to apply it liberally before we left. Lunch was very late due to grill issues, but it hey, better late than never. My sister has a blow up pool, I had packed swimsuits for the girls so they were able to play outside with their cousins.
Listening to my next youngest sister was tough. She's very unhappy, worried, and mainly staying married because of her kids. My brother-in-law cosigned for a vehicle his ex bought for their son. It's a twenty thousand dollar vehicle and my sister is understandably upset as he didn't inform her that he was going to be doing this. His ex doesn't have a good track record, my sister is nervous that this is going to come back to haunt them which it very well could. She feels like she has to do a majority of the parenting herself, hearing her vent was like going back in time to the days when I had a lot of her issues. She's stressed, strung out, and can't enjoy herself. Despite the crap I've gone through and continue to deal with, life is very good because I've learned how to cope with things and manage my emotions while relating to others better.
Tomorrow is day two at the factory. I'm anticipating it going better than Friday, but still not really looking forward to it. I've been telling myself to focus on the paycheck, reminding myself that I'm choosing strategies that are going to reduce debt and increase financial independence, and as my sister said, desparate times call for desparate measures. I took a walk this morning, did the dishes, and was ready and waiting when my mom and step dad pulled into the driveway. I had some anxiety, but I managed it very well. My mom and sister both said that compared to six months ago I'm way better than I was. Getting that credit was amazing even if it was hard to hear that my sister still thinks that I'm more bipolar than ADD. Overall I'm giving the day a solid A and hope these memories last for many, many years.