Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "because despite how critical you are to the finished product, somehow you don't matter! It's like being one of those Essential Workers."

• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• How To Avoid Being Something Other Than What One Is Not
• How to avoid people whom you don't like talking to
• Those Don't Sound Like Bats
• I don't like her because she won't like me
• I don't like the looks of those teenagers
• The ones with their priorities straight don't know how to get what they want, and the ones who get what they want have messed up priorities.
• I don't care. I like who I am because of it.
• How to do nothing, and still look like a hard worker
• Don't misunderstand this one, it was like palm against palm through a window
• Questions for those who don't like capitalism
• One of my IRC friends died and I don't know how to feel
• I like hearing myself talk. It doesn't matter if you don't understand.
• How to hurt yourself on one of those giant inflatable bouncy things
• There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how
• I like hearing you talk. It doesn't matter if I don't understand.
• I would like to return this bread because I don't like it
• We don't talk about those sorts of things
• Don't Sit Next to Me Just Because I'm Asian
• I would kiss you, but I don't know how to kiss
• No one dreams of being a guidance counselor
• The horrible realization that you don't matter
• I Don't Like Monkeys
• How we sleep on the nights we don't make love
• We don't have time. Not like they do.
• We exist in a world of pure communication, where looks don't matter and only the best writers get laid
• When being chased by CIA trainees, don't mention Belgium to the waffle house physicist
• How being an irresponsible geek can kill!
• Textbooks you save because there's that one chapter in back you refer to every two years or so
• I realize that just because I like something a lot, it doesn't mean it is of high quality
• Just because you both have the same problem does not mean you are one another's solution
• I feel like I don't know her for a moment. It passes.
• I don't know how to smile
• Sadly, I discovered I don’t like apples
• Don't assume that just because I'm gay, all I want is sex
• You remember how to whistle don't you?
• The Lovecraftian compulsion to keep noding even as one is being devoured by EDB
• Chipirones en su tinta
• Despite being surrounded by perverts, I manage to have a great time
• We don't write poetry because it's cute
• I can't be a scientist because I don't believe in God.
• On being the first person to finish a test
• You don't have to be a vegetarian to like vegetarian food
• One thing you don't want is a thaw
• Here's your heart, usually I don't like dead things as gifts.
• Just because it's Usenet is no excuse to forget how to punctuate
• I don't like my smile
• How can you arrive anywhere if you don't take that first road trip?
• Christians don't believe that "being good" gets anyone into Heaven
• I Like Bananas Because They've Got No Bones
• Tell me what you don't like about yourself.
• Aliens look like aliens because they're human
• A seething hatred for assholes, bullies and those that don't seem to mind them
• No one asks me if I'm a Satanist or anything because I take the precaution of wearing a predominantly flannel and hawaiian shirt-oriented wardrobe
• I don't know how the fuck you can sleep at night
• If you don't know how to make a mu, you have no business measuring quantities that small.
• Just because I like ballet it doesn't mean I'm a poof
• don't go to bed without knowing what your enemies taste like.
• The Lovecraftian compulsion to keep writing even as one is being devoured
• Everything you like and the guests we'll feed (because you are, that's why)
• Don't assume that just because I'm promiscuous, all I want is sex
• You can't stop thinking of her: this is how you explained it, a proof of your being in love.
• Being Asian is rather like having large breasts
• Your radical ideas about this being like David Foster Wallace have already occurred to others.
• only by consuming pieces of one another can beings such as we exist
• a voice like pebbles being shoved through a harmonica
• I feel like I'm being watched
• I just submit to one or two days of horror for going out and playing at being a normal functioning person
• On being left-handed, the ocean, God, and more than one toothbrush
• I don't think that there's anything worse than being ordinary.
• a lot like the appeal of being electrocuted
• Maybe because we like to cry. Maybe because neither of us can believe.
• I don't like moving.
• how life is all about loving and being loved
• You don't always have to disagree, or agree for that matter
• I don't remember what life was like when I was seven. I like the taste of air. What should I do?
• don't spend it all in one place
• I don't like the drugs
• Because: Context is not important. Because: My life is one long series of contexts.
• Don't Sit Next to Me, Just Because I'm Gay
• I don't know how to fall in love with a woman
• The best part about you is that you don't even know how great you are
• I Don't Like Mondays
• Because the weather is always beautiful, they don't even know that storms can be beautiful too.
• Dogs don't have souls, so it doesn't matter
• we never really fight, so I don't know how this is supposed to go
• you don't love like a cold-weather man
• The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well
• No one learned anything, because there was nothing to learn.
• I don't shiver because I'm cold. I shiver because you are.
• Let's hear that string part again, because I don't think they heard it
• The one thing I wanted more than anything was for someone, just once, to tell me they don't know what they'd do without me
• love like you don't need the money
• if one of us should flicker and vanish, mid-drag, don't bat an eye. claim a spot on the curb and never give an inch.
• Brains Don't Matter
• One of the dangers of necromancy is you don't really know who's on the other side or what they're going to give you in return.
• because his heart was heavy, closing, like a tired eyelid
• Don't worry, I know how to let go.
• we are learning how not to forget, but we still don't know what's true
• Also, I don't think it's weird that we all love one another so much.
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• i don't spend a lot of time thinking about what it feels like to be gored by a chainsaw
• Life is like a strange, unpopular restaraunt filled with odd waiters who give you things you never asked for and don't always like.
• In this moment I'm focused on my own emotions. I don't care about how you feel. I can't.
• i don't like christmas
• I really miss the woman who told me that people don't like me
• I'm happy but you don't like me
• I don't like grass
• Don’t worry, this is only a costume that makes me look like an adult
• I don't even know when I am being sarcastic anymore
• The Wild Colonials
• Being a dickhead
• Being solicited for sex by people who don't even know your gender
• We don't have what we need because we can't stop wanting
• Being stoic, Daoist, and at one with the universe is NO FUN
• How to transcend animal instinct and become a superior being
• on being the only one in a restaurant
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• Things that no one told you...until now, because I'm telling you. Consider yourself fortunate
• On Being the one who goes away
• One problem with being born really soon after Christmas
• I like to be reminded this city survives because of these machines.
• The reason people go to war is because they don't understand the feelings of others.
• How to cure being ticklish
• Don't go, don't change, stop always being the same.
• How to avoid being urinated upon by your baby boy
• I don't know, Timmy, being God is a big responsibility
• No one has ever died because they DIDN'T have a toothpick
• Since when did being spiritual matter? Since when did thread count matter?
• being thrown into the ocean, if nothing else, will teach you how to swim
• I remember books being like air and food and water to me
• You don't even have a chance of being happy if you can't let shit go.
• If a service is "free," then YOU are the product being sold.
• Why chart music is inexplicably popular despite being 95% boiled arse
• Getting the most out of being a temp
• just because you don't doesn't mean you can't
• the only true religion is the one that lives in the heart of every human being
• I don't see like you
• Throw your hands (up) in the air, (and) wave them all around like you (just) don't care
• Don't talk about your mamma like that
• Why I don't like my fellow Asian youth
• A conversation with old country guys is like being a chicken dentist
• Why don't people remember how to use rotary phones?
• Love the one you don't need
• Please don't tell me how to do my job
• I don't think I like your system
• Why I don't like enlightenment
• Low self-esteem is actually one of the most self-centered acts; not unlike suicide
• if being gay isn't illegal, how will we know who's cool anymore?
• Don't force your not forcing one's philosophy on others philosophy on me
• Problems with E2 user poetry
• If you don't like it, leave
• I don't think I like love
• Too bad they don't make one for your heart...
• I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
• Like drugs and alcohol, romance and Cafe Coco don't mix
• those who don't fit into the herd are always recognized
• Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry
• The New Face of the BSOD: An Adventure in Password Recovery
• because eventually you will see past my magical words and focus once again on the matter at hand
• Guns Don't Kill People, I like mayonnaise
• Days go by like sweet summer breeze; I don't know I... can't feel them anymore
• I don't think I realized what I had gotten myself into, but it seemed like the potential for fun and insanity were there in equal parts
• How to scare the Hell out of a Lexus driver, or: Don't take sharp corners at 50mph in the rain
• Because they are clowns, that doesn't mean they aren't dangerous. And being dangerous doesn't mean they aren't clowns.
• I don't want a million women. I just want one.
• She had incongruity for breakfast because she felt like it
• Work like you don't need the monkey
• I don't like your reality, I'm going to make my own
• Two Things I am Compelled to Support because of One Thing I Strongly Believe In
• Don't take any guff from those swine
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• Work like you don't need the money
• I only leave the door open because I know that no one would dare to come in.

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