I've been
doing it all day. Since I woke up, and without any
good reason.
There's quite a bit that I
could be doing instead of this... I could be working
on a
web page I need to finish, I could be working on my own
page... I could
be
eating,
writing, out having
coffee at
Elgin Street Diner, having great
conversations on the phone, writing notes to my
Jessica about how I miss her
while she's away in
Maine...
But I'm not. I'm sitting in my
rickety old chair, starting dumbly at the monitor,
and listening to old, old depressing songs, most of which carry
significant emotional
weight to me. Even the
dog is depressed by this.
And the
old house gives a creak every now and again, just to remind me that
while that noise
could have been made by a person
walking up the stairs, it
wasn't, and I am, in fact,
all alone.
So I sit here. I sit here, and node about sitting here, and make no effort to
call anyone, or
make plans, as all the plans I made for
yesterday fell through,
and I'm just not ready for that kind of day-ending lameness again, I guess.
...
Anyone wanna have a coffee?
Addendum: It's past the point of no return, now. I am now fast-forwarding all songs that are perky, hyper, or otherwise not fitting with the current theme. I've doomed myself.